That week I told my friends and family I was gay. There was a point where i was looking at the train tracks on the T ride home (waiting for a train to come so I could jump) Thankfully I had a change of heart and now i look back at that day. I internalized everything society told me. Before I came out I struggled w/ depression and it got to the point where I was going to take my own life, because, quite frankly, I hated myself.
I have been out nearly 7 years now (age 16, sophomore year of HS). See BC resources: bit.ly/BCLGBTQ and area resources: bit.ly/ma-lgbtq There are also Boston area groups if you prefer something off-campus. There are some great BC groups where you can meet supportive peers. People who are questioning their sexual orientation are also welcome. You don’t need to be certain you are gay before talking to someone or attending an LGBTQ+ meeting. There are many people you can safely talk to about your feelings and questions. Maybe some day we’ll have the courage to come out. It’s hard for me because you can’t talk to anyone w/out revealing your secret. But don’t despair- speaking with a BC counselor or a LGBTQ-friendly advisor can help you work through the conflict that you are feeling. states and countries have actually banned conversion therapy.
Conversion therapies try to change one’s sexual orientation, but they have not been successful and in fact may be harmful. Scientific research has shown that sexual orientation is not something that can be changed.